Yes to Gratefulness by Kathi Middleton

this being human is a guest house
every morning a new arrival
a joy, a depression, a meanness
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor

welcome and entertain them all!

be grateful for whoever comes
because each has been sent
as a guide

Lyrics from the song Kaleidoscope

Cold Plays Album, A Head Full of Dreams

This song makes my heart smile!  This year I am upholding my commitment to saying, Yes to Gratefulness.  What am I grateful for? EVERYTHING, including the things that make me hurt, strive, smile, learn, scared, trust and occasionally lust.  In the past I practiced “selective gratefulness”.  I chose to only be grateful the people, places and things that made me feel GREAT! I complained and ran from evertthinhg else.  You can imagine that I missed out on A LOT!  

I am no longer running,  instead I am reminded daily that life is here to teach us and strengthen us to empower one another along the way.  This journey through life is going to present things that hurt and that is OK, don’t run from it.  Other times, life is going to present moments that feel insanely good, don’t run from those either.  Be grateful for it all.    

In the book, “Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand in the Sun and Be Your Own Person”, Shonda Rhimes shares valuable and intimate personal stories of how saying “Yes” for a year transformed her life.  One of my favorite pieces of wisdom from the book, is when Shonda acknowledges that, Women Can Have It All, Just Not All At the Same Time.  With this understanding, we can then be grateful when things are splendid at home and frantic at our business. Or when a close friendship is going through a rough patch and our health is thriving.  Or when you forget to submit a report at work and your child earned a perfect score on the test that you helped them study for all weekend.  In an ideal world, we would have perfect harmony and balance and all would be well. However, that’s not reality – at least not mine, and thus I chose to be grateful for it all.

I can imagine that someone is reading this and thinking, “This is impossible” or “I have a real life”.   However this is not about saying yes to things that don’t serve anyone or being in denial about real pain and suffering.  This is about stepping out of our comfort zone and finding gratefulness no matter what comes your way.  This is possible by recognizing that any trouble or joy that comes is here to teach us, make us wiser, stronger and grateful.  A few years ago, I begin to say Yes to things that were uncomfortable and the payoff has been invaluable.  The self-assurance, renewed faith, personal insight, relationships, love and gratefulness has changed my life.  When things show up that scare me and I want to run the other way, I talk myself off the ledge by choosing gratefulness and trusting the process.

To all of the bloggers and readers, I would like to express my sincere gratitude.  To express oneself in an attempt to support another is one of the most powerful opportunities that each of us have.  I thank God for allowing us to embark on this "Journey of Yes" together.  Cheers to an Amazing 2016! May all of your best dreams come true! YES, to realizing our dreams and being grateful throughout the journey.

With a heart full of gratefulness
Kathi

Yes to FREEDOM by Fallon Trenise

"She said Yes to FREEDOM"

She was desperate. She was depressed. She was overweight. She was disgusted with herself. She was losing chunks of her hair due to medication and stress. She was smiling on the outside.  She was dying on the inside.  She had done the "right" thing. The "normal" thing.  She went to school,  She got her Master's degree and passed her CPA exam on the first try.  She moved to Atlanta after graduate school and got a "good paying" Corporate Job, but was still flat broke.  She was living paycheck to paycheck. She had $240,000 in student loan debt. She was crushed under the weight of this responsibility and seemingly unbearable burden. She would hide and cry every week in the conference room at a job she hated with a boss who hated her as much as she hated sitting in that cube every day. She felt like her very life was being sucked out of her walking into that building every day.  She knew she was destined for MORE. Greater. Different.  She started a non-profit and wanted to pursue her passion of helping others, but could not afford to devote time or energy to it with her lack of finances and freedom of time. She was frustrated. She was fed up. She was STUCK. 

This was until December 2015, when she decided to pursue her happy again. She started with an internal transformation and having a grateful heart rather than focusing on everything that was wrong in her life. All of the pieces started coming together and she saw a light at the end of the tunnel.  In March 2015, she was introduced to It Works! Global, an all-natural health and wellness company.  She lost nearly 30 pounds, started her own business, earned $11,000 in bonuses in 75 days, and six months later retired from Corporate America – all at 28 years old! She said YES to Freedom even when friends and family who genuinely had her best interest at heart discouraged her from joining a network marketing company. She said YES to Freedom even when they laughed and were unsupportive.  She said YES when People said no. She said YES when people thought she was crazy for leaving Delta Air Lines. She said YES to Freedom through the tears. She said YES to Freedom when people talked behind her back and unfollowed & unfriended her on social media. She said YES when no one showed up. But She NEVER gave up.

Now she has freedom of time. Freedom in her finances. Freedom to travel. Freedom to empower others to pursue their passions!  As of yesterday, she is charted for Presidential Diamond ($17,000/month), the second highest rank in the company and a $150,000 bonus to help wipe out her student loan debt.  The best part is that she has now brought over 2,000 individuals all over the world on the same FREEDOM journey with her.  

She is ME! I am finally walking in my purpose. I am happy. I am helping others gain physical and financial freedom. I am now working on my non-profit that I started two years ago, and I am so excited about the hundreds of thousands of lives that will be touched because of my YES. God truly has BIGGER and BETTER if you trust Him to lead you.

Fight through the No's for your family. For your future. For your FREEDOM. My prayer is that you say YES. 

FreedomWithFallon.com

Yes to Saying No by Shaton Robinson

Say YES to Saying No!

Something that I have always struggled with is setting boundaries and allowing not only people but myself as well coerce me into always saying yes. When I’m tired, uncomfortable, and busy or just want to be plain ole lazy I would say yes to whatever the task was (given it was ethical).  I started to realize that I was taking care of others more than I was taking care of myself.  It left me feeling totally exhausted and I came to the realization that I simply cannot do everything.  If you aren’t taking care of yourself then you can’t take care of people around you.  Being a "hard charging people person" (even by job description) this was and is still a hard nuance to rationalize. 

I’m realizing in life that the ability to say no is an infrequent and valuable skill.  Learning to say no is extremely important and it was important for me to soul search, especially while I was pregnant, to understand why.  The answer that I discovered, was that it is essential in order to devote more time and energy to the things that matter most.  Initially when I started this process it was a little hard and I felt really guilty.  I am now happy that it has given me more time to focus on the things that I’m happy to say YES to.

Yes to an All You Can Be Attitude by Iwancia Middleton

As I sit starring out my bedroom window contemplating on what a” Year of Yes” means to me, I realized that I must first analyze what the word yes means to me.  This is a powerful word.  It has so many different meaning and it changes based on the perception of the person utilizing it.  As I broke the letters down in the word yes, I quickly envisioned how this word will transform the year 2016. 

Y(yielding)to produce

E(exemplary) serving as a desirable model; representing the best of its kind

S(splendor) magnificent and splendid appearance
                             

Yielding

I quickly envisioned a year where I produce a no limits attitude.  In the past I’ve settled for things in my life that didn’t encourage, engage or enhance my life, but no more.  I had to realize that I’m capable of being the director, the Vice president and even the CEO. I have been my own worst adversary, however today is a new day and Yes I am worth and accomplished enough to be much more.  I will steadily move forward and strive to reach all my goals.

Exemplary

I grew up in an era where young African American women were taught of woman of color whose accomplishments changed and molded history for example:

Madam C.J. Walker (first black self-made millionaire)

Shirley Chisholm (first black woman elected to congress)

Ida B Wells (pioneer in media and communication)

However today we have lost our vision.  We have our female youth saying yes to twerking, low self-esteem and envy.  Now don’t get me wrong we have some amazing woman in leadership, but we don’t talk or educate our youth about them and this must change.  I was fortunate enough to have a mom who was fully engaged in the civil rights movement and consistently reinforced the worth of my culture and presenting as a role model for me and my peers. So, today I am saying yes to education, representation (being a role model), and encouragement of our young female African American youth in the hopes that they will in return pay it forward.

Splendor

Last, we all must continually radiate our own splendor.  How will I do this, you may ask?  First, a splendid appearance comes from within.  It starts with your spirituality and for me it’s my faith in God. Having faith in God, teaches me that I am not perfect, and nor are my peers, family and friends.  With this knowledge I can say “Yes” to transforming my flaws and radiating my beauty out to others.  I will release my critical personality and embrace a more forgiving, encouraging personality towards myself and others. 

In conclusion, my “Year of Yes” will be fulfilling, providing my life with substance and completeness.  I will present an “all you can be attitude” and lastly I will surround myself with some of the most amazing woman of color this world has to offer (for example my fellow bloggers).  May God fill your lives with beauty, grace, knowledge and style.

Yes to Motherhood by DeAndrea Beaven

Yes to Motherhood

From the “I’m too Busy Girl”

I am going to spare you a long paragraph of soul searching….it’s self-serving and boring! I am going to get to the “Nitti Gritty” of it all because that is what everyone truly wants and people really appreciate the transparency.

I’m a new Mother, when I say new I mean BRAND new! Her name is Weslie, she is 2 months old, I am covered in spit up and my hair is barely combed….yep she’s that new. I love her because ideally she makes me a better person. I adore her because she is teaching me patience. She also forced me to slow down and take more time to smell the roses (Yes it’s cliché but you get it.

Previous to me being a Mother, I was always “Too Busy.” I was too busy for my family, at times too busy for worship and a lot of times too busy to be a present wife. To be honest things began to suffer, I began to suffer there never seemed to be enough hours in the day and I was tired, literally lay in the bed and slip into a coma tired. Then things changed, I became In the Family Way (my Grandmother’s way of saying that I was expecting) and nothing slows you down like a little morning sickness and back pain. Don’t get me wrong I could still do stuff just not as quickly and not nearly as efficiently. So instead of volunteering as much as I wanted, working as long as I needed, visiting the people I needed to visit I was forced to sit. I had a great pregnancy and I wasn’t on bed rest, but as any Mother/Expecting Mother will tell you, I had to literally chill out, and it made me impatient and it made me angry, it tested my patience and instead of enjoying my pregnancy the way I should’ve I just wanted to feel like myself again and be able to move around without getting so sleepy. I know…..ungrateful right?

Finally my daughter came and nothing really slows you down like a somewhat fussy baby and a C Section. On top of that, having to carry 1 million things with you if you wanted to leave the house. However, the experience has made me much more patient. My daughter is not a morning person and she requires at least one hour of cuddle time with Mommy. This means I can’t rush to the gym, I can’t wake up grab a tea and go. I can’t sleep until the last minute, get dressed and run out of the door. I wake up, grab Wes V and we get in the recliner for a good hour before the day begins and I am beyond grateful for this, and I have never felt so fulfilled in my entire life. I realize that I was so busy making a living I was not making a life, so I have officially decided to not just embrace it, but be grateful for it. There are still a Million Things I need to do, but until cuddle time is over, none of it really matters.

Yes to Me by Vanessa Davis

My Yes Experience!

All of my life I have felt something pushing me, pulling me, coaxing me to do things on my own.  I've had all kinds of ideas for businesses. I half pursued a few in my life. I took my first job at 13 years of age. I changed my birth certificate to state that I was 15 and started to explore the joys of actually making money! I was hooked! Every time I took a job from then on I was a supervisor, a key holder, a lead, a manager. I thought "This works for me", so I continued to pursue these types of positions, but in the back of my mind I still wanted to own my on business. In college I started a photography business, while attending school and still working for a major retailer. I was very proud of my accomplishment and I did well.

Inevitably, life happened (as it does with us all); I had a baby, got married, and had another baby, got divorced. At that point, life was about survival. I sometimes received child support and sometimes did not, but always had to take care of my babies.  Therefore, I was forced to give up any dreams of entrepreneurship and work for someone else full time (all of the time), and go back to school.  At one point I was working between 50 and 60 hours a week and going to school full-time. It has all been worth it but.......I was never really saying YES TO ME!  I know graduating from college is a major accomplishment, but I was really just going to ensure I could always have better jobs working for other people.  So really, I did not feel like that was saying YES TO ME! Now, don't get me wrong I have never had the desire to work for anyone else. I do not think entrepreneurship is for everyone. I know that there are people who take great pride in working a 9 to 5 and I applaud their efforts. As for me, even in college I would take entrepreneurship classes, if that tells you anything.

My children have grown to be wonderful, intelligent young people. I am so proud of them and proud of the fact that I took the time out to raise them and put them on the right path. I do feel like I said YES TO ME for that. I never have to look back and say I should have pay more attention or I could have done better with them.  I really feel like I have make wonderful decisions with them.  My son will soon be 15 recently went to live with his father. The jury is still out on this one, but I feel like it was the best decision for him.  I am not a man and there is no man in my house to teach him how to be a man, so I felt it was best.  His father has been asking for him for years.  I felt it would be selfish of me to say no any longer.  He is no longer a baby.  He is growing into a Man. My daughter is almost 18, graduating in May and going to college. Again not YES TO ME! Yes to them, but I am glad to have said yes to them.

Soon it will just be me! If I don't say YES TO ME now, something is seriously wrong! 

Well, I have thought about this for a while.  So, I have been preparing to say YES TO ME for a couple of years now.  A little over 2 years ago I bought a brand new car, and my second home and then I QUIT MY JOB!  It was a hard decision to make.  At times, I felt like I had lost my mind! Who does that!  However, it has been totally worth it! I finally started my own business(es), something I felt the need to do all of my life. 

The hardest thing I've ever done! The hardest job I've ever had! 

One of the greatest joys I've ever felt and the most peace I've ever enjoyed!  I LOVE IT!

I don't know why it took so long to do what God has been pushing me to do all along.  I do know that he has perfect timing.  Perhaps, I was suppose to be learning from all of those experiences and they prepared me to say YES TO ME finally!

I would suggest to everyone to follow the GOD given passions in their lives! I have more to explore! I am excited to see what happens next!

Yes to Debt Free by Bridgette Stephens

Have you ever been asked the question, “Are you debt free?” Most people would answer this question, by saying, I really do not have much debt and go on to say, just my car payment, and I pay off my credit card every month or every other month, and so on. Of course, neglecting the gigantic debt of student loans, hoping they will somehow just disappear. Well, that used to be my answer as well, before a complete transformation in my perspective on money.  Perhaps you may be able to relate, the feelings of been overwhelmed with having to work to make payments, not able to chase some dreams that lie deep in your heart, not able to take the vacations you desire, not able to give more when you would like to,  and so forth. Finally, I decide I will no longer be bound up with finances and say, “YES” to embarking on a debt free journey.

I decided to gain knowledge of God’s perspective on being a great steward over the things HE has entrusted me with, and it has transformed my view of money as seeing it as fuel units.  A few key scriptures that have been very insightful for my debt free journey are listed below.

·         Give to everyone what you owe them: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor. (Romans 13:7 NIV)

This scripture teaches us to pay everyone what you owe….

·         Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law. (Romans 13:8 NIV)

This scripture clearly instructs us to leave no debt outstanding, pay if off as quickly as possible.

·         The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender. (Proverbs 22:7 NIV)

Debt is not a sin, yet to be a “slave” is not a good thing-Jesus came to set us free…..do not be wrap up in financial bondage, distracts you from fulfilling God’s assignments….

·         The wicked borrow and do not repay, but the righteous give generously; (Psalm 37:21 NIV)

God wants us to be extravagant givers. As believers, debt should be avoided as much as possible. God does not ask anyone to borrow to complete HIS work, or any assignment HE gives to you. Debt makes it more difficult for Christians to serve God, especially when you mind is bogged down with what you may be called to do, and the reality of your current situation.

Awesome news, God is able to do immeasurable more than you can ask and imagine! I am so amazed at how I took the steps to become debt free, doing my best in the natural by getting up early, living on a written budget, making smart money moves, seeking ways to increase cash flow, selling items, and tackling one debt at a time with full force. Do your best in the natural, God will handle the rest in the supernatural!

I decided to divide my debts into two sections: consumer debts and student loan debts. This allowed me to celebrate once a list was complete. I am super please to share that I started on 05/07/2014, and six months later on 11/06/2014, paid off all consumer debt, total of $27,817.21. I started student loan debts on 01/01/2015, now have paid off six out of seven loans ($48, 418.24), and will be complete by end of March 2016, total of $63,489.17. Grand total of both lists….$91,306.38!! Screaming to the top of my lungs, I am DEBT FREE!!! Cash is king!! To GOD be the glory!! Investing for the future, so that I may leave a legacy!!

Lastly, getting out of debt will not happen quickly, be patient. Pray for strength, perseverance, and fresh ideas as everything begins with a thought. Work hard while you are young, so that your latter days will be your best days!